How to Get Over Trust Issues: A Product of Unpleasant Personal Experiences

A relation between people is a house based on a foundation of trust. When this base is shattered because of deception, betrayal, or disappointment, what follows may be deep and permanent. It is from the perception of Alexey Lunyov that it can make an interesting beginning in understanding the workings of these personal experiences in relation to trust issues. This paper explores the psychological perspective of trust, problems in idealizing relationships, and ways distrust could be overcome so that healthier bonds could be established.

What Are the Psychological Effects of Betrayal and Deception by Friends and Loved Ones?

Betrayal or deception by any ally, friend, or by someone one even loves fosters mistrust and doubt against whatever is concerned with that person. In accordance with Lunyov, a person, who has an ideal perception of love and romantic relations, becomes the most sensitive to the groundless suspiciousness. The destructive distrust can be realized in many devastating forms. For example, one betrayal takes place and universal conclusions appear: all men are cunning or everybody is treacherous. This attitude may, in turn, grow into a fixed idea that keeps people locked inside a realm of imaginary enemies.

Such experiences have a wide impact, much further than just the pain that is felt. There can be issues of unjust generalization on a global scale and continuous paranoia; always being on guard that will bring about possibilities of betrayal to such an extent that these will affect psychological health and social functioning. More often than not, the cause of this unconscious attempt to avoid admitting one’s imperfections and the lack of self-esteem exaggerates each failure into a disaster, the root cause of distrust—how to identify and address?

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How can I start trusting people after being betrayed?

How to start trusting again

Take a decision for yourself how you will start to believe and know what made you feel in this way. Strive for knowing the provenance of your mistrust among your experiences and realize that your negative feelings are a result of some particular incident, not a general truth. Adopt positively; let others encourage your virtue by being sincere with them in open dialogue.

Where to turn to if I have problems with my trust?

Therapy, support groups, and the circle you keep can offer the kind of support needed to understand your prevailing situation; honest talks with whomever you are trying to put your trust into will be the best form of reassurance and understanding.

How do I know that I have a problem in the first place?

Signs include overgeneralizing negative experiences, seeing betrayal in minor mistakes, and an overwhelming belief that nobody is worthy of your trust. These thoughts might give rise to efforts not to let others get too close or to act in their presence as if people are filled with evil or malice or whatever.

When should I seek professional help for my trust issues?

Seek professional advice when your trust issue disturbs your daily life and undermines your ability to create and hold relationships, or if you feel that on your own, you can’t get out of the vicious circle of being distrustful and negative.

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1 Comment

  1. Man, people suck.

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